Weakness
by Daalny
Summary: we all have them.  Lewis/Hobson
1. Chapter 1

The computer screen is fuzzy and I'm having trouble seeing the numbers on my mobile. I've been teased by Hathaway long enough about my long arm vision. This morning I'm on me way to the optometrist for an appointment. I sit in the chair and answer the questions.

_One or two?_

"Two"

_Three or Four_

"Four"

It's official I need glasses not only for my long arm vision but apparently I have astigmatism as well. To tell the truth I'm scared to death of contact lenses so I opt for glasses. As I enter the display area I have no idea what to choose by way of frames. A young woman is trying to help me but I have no clue what she is talking about with frame shape. Fortunately me mobile rings, I'm needed.

"Mr. Lewis! You need to pick some frames so we can make your glasses." The young assistant shouts.

"You seem to know what would work just pick some, don't worry about cost I'll pay it." I bellow as I leave.

I don't think much of it until end of the day when I go to pick them up. "Are you sure these are mine?"

"Yes Mr. Lewis, I chose a solid black plastic frame and the geometric lense shape compliments your face. If we had gone with circular wire glasses you would look…owlish."

"Owlish" I echo.

I must admit I can see with these! The frames seem too young but the assistant assures me that they are the most suitable for me. I take out my wallet and hand her my Barclay card.

Driving home was a new experience, the headlights of the cars didn't blur together.

I take care to place my new eyewear in the case before going to bed. In the morning I shower, shave and dress. I finish knotting up my tie and put on my glasses, I'm not used to the look but I do like the fact that I can read the numbers on me mobile and read road signs without guessing at half of the letters.

There are some hushed whispers as I walk by and by habit I ignore them. James doesn't whisper he simply stares at me open mouthed.

"Yes James?"

"Sir, you're wearing glasses." He informs me.

"Oh that's right you're a detective?" I mock.

"Those are good frames."

"The lass at the doctors office picked them out for me. Suited me face or summat like that."

The whispers continue for most of the day and I continue to ignore them. The week continues and eventually the chatter remains constant instead of dying down when I enter a room. Eventually the call comes in that a body has been discovered. It has become routine to don the blue jumpsuit. This body was found near a lake so in addition to the suit wellies are also needed. The white suited SOCO officers are taking samples and pictures. With my enhanced vision I can spot the blonde hair of Laura and I call her name.

_Hobson_

I hear a cheerful greeting and turn. I don't believe what I'm seeing! Detective Inspector Robert Lewis is walking towards me wearing a blue jumpsuit and glasses. He looks incredibly good and I have to remind myself not to gulp.

I must have made some noise for Hathaway is smirking. Mercifully Lewis doesn't notice and I give him a quick run down of what I've found. His phone rings and he moves off to answer it. James cozies up beside me, "Quite a change isn't it?" He asks.

"I don't know what you mean" I flat out lie.

"You may call me dishy but I know who and what you really want and currently he's on the phone."

"James" I try to say sternly but it doesn't work.

"Are glasses your weakness doctor? You know his weakness, exploit it!" He tells me before trotting off to join his boss.

God help me but James is right, I do want Robbie. I've wanted him since my party, any excuse to kiss him. Then letting my hand linger on his face to wipe away the lipstick. Damn those glasses!

_Lewis_

Thank God for these glasses I find I don't have the usual headache I have in the afternoons. Innocent wants an update so the pair of us inform her. Like James she stares at me. Afterwards I pull James aside. "Why are people staring? I mean I'm not the first man to wear glasses."

"It's the type of glasses sir."

I shoot him a look over the frames, "Go on?"

"Don't get me wrong they look good."

"but?"

James is gesticulating more with his hands, "Well it's just generally-

I think I've sussed it," I should be wearing old man glasses?"

"No, sir. It's just you don't follow fashion and your glasses are highly fashionable. People are going to wonder what you're going to purchase next."

I'm getting frustrated, "I wear them so I can see what I'm bloody doing!"

"I know sir." He says and I know he's being patronizing.

"I'm not going to be buying purple socks!"

_Hobson_

I'm at home and I've been milling over what James said to me. Robbie's weakness? Beer? Football?

My stomach growls reminding me I need to eat. It is said that a way to man's heart is through his stomach. I know for a fact being a doctor it's through the chest. But perhaps there is something to that saying.

_Lewis_

I had given up watching television and I never understood why. With my glasses it's as though I have a 3-D set. I can't believe my eyes were that bad. I also can't believe the stir it's causing in the station. I have half a mind to ditch them but I realize that's a stupid thing to do. I need to be able to see to work. Besides what's the fuss? I'm sure the saying Boys don't make passes with girls who wear glasses goes both ways.

_Hobson_

Every WPC seems to be flirting with Robbie. Women who wouldn't have given him the time of day now are offering pens whenever he needs one. He seems oblivious to it all but eventually he will catch on. He see's me in the corridor of the station and his face changes. The smile he sports actually reaches his eyes. I then remember his weakness

_Hathaway_

"Any plans for the weekend?"

"Not really, but now that you mention it I'm going to pass on the pub. Laura and I are going to dinner."

My curiosity is peaked, "Where?"

"Tortino's, I think she said."

"have fun sir" I say and inwardly smile _Exploit the weakness!_

_Lewis_

I don't know where Laura found this place but it is amazing. A small almost literal hole in the wall Italian restaurant, I ordered a small plate of pasta taking advantage of the generous amounts of garlic bread. I see Laura regarding me as I'm chewing. "What it's my weakness."

_Hobson_

The house red is fabulous I probably shouldn't be on my second glass but it so rich. Robbie is using a piece of garlic bread to mop up the left over marinara sauce. I must be staring for he mutters, "What, it's my weakness."

"I want to be your weakness."

Suddenly his head snaps up and due to the light reflecting off his glasses I can't see his eyes. Curse this wine I must have actually said my thoughts aloud. Time seems to stand still I can't seem to move. Robbie pushes back in his chair and I'm prepared for him to leave when he reaches into pocket and withdraws his wallet. He dumps a large quantity of bills on the table. And I close my eyes so I don't have to watch him go. I only open them when I feel fingers on my cheek. I look up and see him standing beside me a tender look on his face.

He holds out his hand to me and I take it.


	2. Chapter 2

_Lewis_

"Weakness?" I ask

"Garlic bread is your weakness, you told me once. Well fair is fair… glasses are my weakness."

I pull up short, "glasses?"

She seems beyond mortified but I take the fact that she hasn't let go of my hand as a good thing, "It's not just glasses, it's glasses on you."

I see her mind whirring choosing her next words carefully, "I don't want to be friends with you anymore."

I understand what she's saying, "then let me court you."

She relaxes and nods.

_Hobson_

I'm relieved, relieved that I didn't scare him off. As we walk back to the restaurant and our cars I hear a question, "what is your favorite color?"

"Green"

We exchange banter back and forth until my car looms.

He kisses me on the cheek and we go our separate ways.

_Lewis_

I'm dating again; it's been a long time since the Midnight Addiction concert where I met Val. I know Laura; at least I think I do, now I'm going to court her. I'm trying to think back to all the things I did with Val and before that Diane. I'm in my fifties and I still don't understand the dating scene.

As I put my glasses in the case on my nightstand I smile.

In the morning Hathaway is searching for information on the computer while I'm on the phone trying to do the same. The desk sergeant from front of house comes back with an envelope.

"This was just delivered sirs."

I take the package and open it. Inside are two formal looking envelopes and a piece of paper.

_Please deliver to DI Lewis and DS Hathaway_ below the scribble was two sketches of them another hasty scrawl announced _they look like this._

I take one of the envelopes and open it.

**Faces**

An Art Exhibition of the work of Philip Horton

The location of the art gallery was also given.

"Something interesting sir?" Hathaway pipes up.

"Actually yes. Do you remember Philip Horton? The lad who could draw anything from memory?"

"Yes" James states as he stands up to view the invite.

"Well we've been invited to his exhibition, even included sketches to make sure the invitations got to the right people."

James smiles and I smile too. I had wondered what would happen to that lad. Brilliant talent but even he said, "I wish could make things up."

I think an art exhibition would be a wonderful date.

_Hobson_

I'm tugging on my dress; I'm terrified that it carries some lingering smell from the medical bay. The gallery is clear across the other side of town. It makes more sense for me to dress here and hop into the car than go home. Robbie drives with a confidence that I envy. We manage to find parking and make our way inside the gallery. There is a decent sized crowd formed already. On the stark white walls hang canvasses of various sizes and on each is a face. We are offered champagne as we peruse the art. Robbie stops in front of one wall with many depictions of the same person, a woman.

"Someone you know?" I ask.

"Nell Buckley, Phil's girlfriend of sorts. She was murdered by the riverbank."

Our thoughts are interrupted by the appearance of a Youngman in somewhat casual attire.

"You're the policeman Inspector Lewis." The Youngman announces

"Hello Philip" Robbie says warmly as he offers his hand.

Memory sparks and remember Robbie asking me about autism. This must be whom he was referring to.

Robbie points towards the art, "This is great work. "

Philip beams under the praise and points to someone, "Mr. Bellamy saw my work after I got my first and this is my exhibition. Are you a Policewoman?"

Young Mr. Horton is a charming individual and we begin a conversation I don't take it personally when he doesn't make eye contact. Eventually the young artist circulates the best he can under the supervision of Mr. Bellamy.

I look at the art, the talent this youngman has is tremendous. I'm drawn to one wall a pen and ink drawing captures my attention. It's James and Robbie in their office. James is depicted behind a desk while Robbie leans in to see what is on the desk. The detail is amazing, the angle of Robbie's tie as it dangles in the air the texture of James' hair it's as if I could feel it through the paper.

"Bloody hell" Robbie says in awe as he nears the drawing.

"It's good isn't it?" I say and he can only nod openmouthed.

Three quarters of an hour later James arrives and sees the collection as well. He doesn't stay long citing music practice. Nonetheless, he takes the time to talk with Philip.

I'm enjoying this casual spending of time. I don't know what I was expecting when I told Robbie that I wanted to dissolve our friendship. Part of me was expecting him to drag me off to his flat and the other for him to leave and never speak to me again. This courting has taken me by surprise. We've been friends for so long and slowly we are transitioning hopefully into something deeper. I turn and see him staring at me and my breath catches. While it may take time I think this slow approach will be more rewarding than a quick fumble in bed.


	3. Chapter 3

_Hobson_

My resolve is tested when he drives me back to the station so I can collect my car. There's a moment of awkward silence when he shuts off the engine. I can see the internal battle raging within him, I know he wants to kiss me. My suspicions are confirmed when his hand comes to rest behind my neck and he pulls me towards him. I put my hand on the center console to steady myself. Our lips meet and at first sweet kisses are traded, the enclosed confines of the car amplifies the smacking sound. It doesn't take long for things to turn carnal. I sigh and he takes advantage of it by introducing his tongue. Our teeth collide and I thread my hands through his hair. I don't know how far we would have gone if not for the knock on the window.

_Lewis_

Kissing, I've missed it. I've also missed having someone to hold, feeling the warmth of a body beneath my hands. When the sound of knuckles hitting glass reach my ears I tear myself away. I pull away and see Laura looking dazed but she quickly recovers when she pulls her lower lip into her mouth I suppress a moan. I roll down the window and see DS Cooper.

"Nice night" He says with a smirk.

"What the bloody hell are doing out 'ere?" I demand.

"I could ask you two the same thing." Cooper volleys.

I shoot him a look that could peel paint and he backs away from the car. "The CCTV cameras are down for maintenance so I'm watching the lot. Making sure no crimes are being committed." He says with a smirk.

"Well carry on then." I dismiss him.

He buggers off and I'm glad I turn to look at Laura her head is in her hand and she's shaking. I'm at a loss of what to do until she looks at me and she's laughing!

"Are we that stupid? At least the cameras were off I can imagine this going on YouTube" She moans.

I shrug, "My son once said that a police station is psychological dead zone. Like how you don't learn at school and the like."

She laughs again and I run my tongue over my teeth.

"Bring back any memories?" She giggles

"Nope this is new, never been bust for snogging in a car."

She kissed me on the cheek before exiting the car and DS Cooper escorts her to her car. I put both hands on the steering wheel and exhale. I must remind myself to pay attention to the road instead of thinking of Laura. When I get into bed I have trouble falling asleep my mind is on a continuous loop of Laura and her kisses.

To avoid being late for work I skip breakfast and in my haste I forget my mobile. Turns out the body from the lake was a murder but we still need identification. It's a day for paperwork, which suits me just fine for I'm not feeling too grand. James seems to notice when he sees that I haven't touched the coffee he brought for me.

"Not to your liking?" He asks.

"I don't want it" I say shaking my head

James has no moved beside me, "Do you want something else?"

"No, I skipped breakfast and truth be told I don't fancy anything."

What I do fancy is a trip to the toilet however, when I stand up I find the floor is rushing up to meet me. Even with my fancy glasses my vision goes wonky and I hear James yelling.

_Hobson_

I hear sirens and ignore it. After all we are based at a Police Station. It isn't until I one of our assistants bursts in and announces that someone upstairs is being taken out by ambulance. I remind myself to ask Robbie about it later. I'm about to prepare another body when Superintendent Innocent comes in.

"Dr. Hobson?" The woman asks.

"Yes, Ma'am how can I help you."

She seems troubled, "Do you have the contact information for DI Lewis' next of kin?"

I feel as though a bucket of ice water has been dumped on me. I hear my voice but I don't recognize it. "His daughter Lynn. She's in Manchester works as a nurse. Phone number should be in his mobile."

Innocent shakes her head angrily, "Can't find his mobile."

I walk towards the Medical map near the break area, "There's nine major hospitals in the Manchester area. I'll find her…where was he taken?"

"Radcliffe" Innocent delivers.

"I'll go get information and phone Lynn." I say with a voice stronger than I feel.

On the car ride to the Radcliffe I've already phoned three hospitals. Entering the Radcliffe I see James' long frame shoved into a plastic seat. He stands when he sees me.

"He collapsed in the office by the time ambulance got there he was mumbling about pain and wouldn't let anyone touch him."

I curse being a doctor for a million diagnoses run through my head. I see a flash of white and physician approaches James. "You're here for Robert Lewis?"

"Yes." James delivers authoritatively. I see that James has Robbie's glasses in his palm and the sight makes me want to cry.

The doctor examines his clipboard, "Well your inspector is a lucky one. Ultrasound reveals a juicy inflamed appendix. We're going to remove it, you said he skipped breakfast?"

James nods, "Yeah and he hasn't drank anything either."

"Superb" the physician states.

I find myself sinking into a chair and realize I'm holding something. I look down and see my mobile. I dial another hospital and then another until I find Lynn Lewis. With the information I have on hand I tell her the situation. She thanks me before telling me she's on her way to catch a train. I look at the clock it should take her a little over two hours to reach the hospital. Just enough time for the surgery to be over and for Robbie to be moved to recovery. The fact that the appendix was inflamed and not ruptured will greatly help.

The sky is just changing it's colors when a young woman wearing the dark blue scrubs of a nurse is escorted by a PC. James was able to arrange a car to pick her up at the train station, I recognize her from the photo's on Robbie's desk apparently so does James. We identify ourselves and we all sit together. It isn't long before the attending physician sees us. "You'll be pleased to know the surgery was done laparoscopically he should be up and walking tomorrow morning. We'll keep him over night, keep an eye on the intestines and make sure he's comfortable after that it should just be pain management and then release home."

Lynn seems to ignore the doctor, "can I see him?"

The doctor softens, "of course."

The three of us are lead away, only Lynn is allowed near the bedside James and I wait near the curtain.

After a few minutes she returns, her eyes are a bit bloodshot but she seems relieved. "He says he's fine but he wants his glasses, since when does he wear glasses?"

James snickers and withdraws the items from his jacket pocket, "A little over a week is his mutter."

Lynn regards James, "Do you have his keys? He said I should sleep at his flat and not stay here. Threatened to send Cooper after me if I do."

James smiles, "Yeah I have his things I can give you a ride if you like."

"Please I'm in no mood to figure out what bus to get." Lynn answers.

James extends his arm to point the way and the two leave. With them gone I make my way to the bed. Robbie is laid out and IV is pumping fluids and antibiotics. He makes a noise and I move closer. I hold his hand mindful of the IV tubing. "Are you all right? Do you have pain?"

He moans again, "Lynn…go sleep...Send Cooper after ya."

Ever the father, "Robbie, Lynn went to your flat. James took her."

"Laura?"

"Yes Robbie, I'm here."

He squeezes my hand after a few moments he moans again and a nurse appears, I watch as he takes Robbie's vitals and administers an injection—morphine would be my guess. His agitation abates and I stay with him until he's moved from recovery to a room. Once he's situated I go home. I text his room number to Lynn and James. I don't get much sleep but I do get some before stumbling into the shower in the morning.


	4. Chapter 4

_Hobson_

I swing by the hospital in the morning and I'm not surprised to see Lynn. "They're getting him back into bed, he's just had a walk. I'd help but he doesn't want me to. That doesn't surprise me what does surprise me is his choice of eyewear if you can believe that."

"Oh I can believe it" I say and something catches in Lynn's eye but it's only for a moment before a bellow of "Lynn!" comes through the door.

"That takes me back" She says and she nods towards me "come on."

I enter with Lynn and see Robbie propped up on pillows. He looks in more command of his facilities from when I last saw him. A light blue gown covers him and damn it he's wearing his glasses.

"Have a nice walk Dad?"

"Physical therapy my arse, hurt like hell!" He snarls.

Lynn addresses him as a nurse, "A blood clot would hurt a lot more Dad."

He softens instantly, "I know love, I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry we all know it's not nice to be in here. But from what the doctor says you may be out tomorrow. Your incisions look good."

Robbie makes a face, "these holes you mean."

Lynn makes the same face and it's amazing the similarity between Father and Daughter, "If they had done it the old fashioned way and if your appendix had burst you would be in here a week or more."

"Small mercies" he mutters.

"I'm going to the station, I'll swing by later." I say with a wave.

"See you later" he tells me.

When I do get to the station I'm accosted by nearly everyone wanting information.

"Hathaway said it was he appendix is that true?" A male voice asks

"Heart attack?" Another voice interrupts.

"He had an inflamed appendix it was removed he's fine." I say with my best doctor voice. Then on a lighter note, "you should listen to Hathaway!"

The day progresses and soon I find myself driving back to the Radcliffe. I knock on the door before going in. Robbie is on the bed and I don't see Lynn. "She's having a cup of tea in the canteen."

He reaches for his blanket and grimaces, "Are you in pain?"

"I don't like you seeing me like this, I sent Lynn away too."

"You can be weak in front of me" I say softly as I run my finger through his hair not caring that it hasn't been washed yet. I see his glasses on the table and I pick them up and put them on him. "There, now I'll be weak too."

He laughs and then groans squeezing my hand. On queue a nurse comes in, "It's been four hours Mr. Lewis time for your painkillers." The head of the bed is raised a bit more and he swallows his pills. I stay with him while they kick in we watch some game-show on TV as a distraction when it's over he's more relaxed.

"Are you in much pain?" I ask.

"Now and then, I still have to—"he points to the toilet, "then they'll let me go. Doctor, thinks in the morning they'll be some movement."

"I can always get you some coffee and I'm sure James would give you a cigarette."

He half laughs half groans.

"knock, knock" Lynn says and comes in. I get up from the chair and Lynn moves into it. "Feeling better Dad?"

He reaches out and touches her face, "Yeah, love. You should get some sleep I'm sorry for being a grumpy sod."

She playfully bats his hand away, "All right I'll go but you better take your damned pills."

"Yes Ma'am." He states.

"I'll give you a lift."

She grabs her coat, "Ta"

"It's good of you to come" She tells me in the car.

"Of course, I'm very fond of your dad."

"I know…he's fond of you. Listen, you should know that I approve of you and him."

"We've only had one date" I say off hand.

"He's planning another." She says as she exits the car.

_Lewis_

Shortly after Laura and Lynn left something else left too. I flush the toilet with satisfaction I can't wait to go home. In the morning Lynn arrives in my car to pick me up. I was able to use the shower this morning and with a fresh set of clothes I feel more human. I've been given medication for pain and instructions on how to keep my incisions clean. I've been cleared for light duty as long as I stay at my desk but I know Lynn would have me head if I did that so I'll stay at home.

I put on an old vinyl album and pass out on the couch. I only wake when Lynn gets me up so I can go for a walk. She prepares a huge dinner and when I make a fuss she simply puts the nearly half of it into some containers that she bought. "This way I'll know you'll have something to eat, I'm going back in the morning."

I get up and hug me daughter, "love you."

"I know dad, now sit down and eat." She mumbles against my chest.

I sit at the small table and she joins me, "Theatre next?"

"Sorry love?"

Lynn speaks slowly something she picked up from her Mother, "I think you should take Laura to the theatre."

I'm racking me brain I don't remember discussing Laura with Lynn.

I recognize the mischievous glint in me daughters eye she knows something! "You were pretty out of it on the morphine. Threatened to send Cooper after me and you were worried about where to take Laura on your next date."

"Is it too late to go back to the hospital?" I ask halfheartedly.


	5. Chapter 5

_Lewis_

In the morning I dress for work after Lynn checks the bandages on my incisions.

"What do you do if you have pain?" She asks in no nonsense tone.

"Take medication." I pat my jacket pocket and the pills rattle.

"What do you do if you have a fever, chills or breakthrough pain?" Is her next question.

"Go to the Radcliffe." I say without hesitation.

Me daughter smiles at me and I'm damned proud she's a nurse. James is driving us I get into the car seat carefully. Changing elevations is bit difficult since I'm still a bit tender. Lynn gets into the back seat and we head off to the train station. When we arrive I giver her a tenner

"What's this for?" She asks.

"have an ice cream on the train." I tell her and her eyes light up. I would always buy her an ice cream when we traveled on the rail.

She scoffs, "thanks dad."

"Bye pet" Is my mutter as I give her a kiss. The drive to the station is uneventful James drives carefully and applies the brakes gingerly so the seatbelt doesn't dig in.

I make it out of the car with no help but when I see the three steps that lead to the entrance and I must make some noise for James is beside me. He stands close so our shoulders are touching. The bulk of his body keeps me upright and I can lean against it for support. We make our way to the office and I refuse the offers of tea, I'm in no mood for multiple trips to the bog. People periodically poke their heads in to say, "welcome back."

I take the nearest file and dive in, three hours later I feel a bit sore I ask James to retrieve the pills from the jacket, which is hanging behind the door. He tosses them to me and I catch them. Me bloody mobile rings, it's also in the jacket. I make a hasty gesture and James smiles and gets the phone and answers it. "Hello? Actually yes he's taking them right now. I will."

James ends the conversation on the phone and gives me a look, "That was your daughter wanting to know if you had taken your pills. I told her 'yes' and you're under orders to take a walk later."

I simply raise me eyebrows and quietly thank God that I have a good family.

_Hobson_

I hear that Robbie is back; I make my way upstairs and see that he is behind his desk. "Buy you something to eat?"

His smile is infectious, "Do you mind driving?"

"Not at all" I say with a smile.

We go to a small pub and he orders a huge basket of chips, which he douses liberally with brown vinegar, and a pinch of salt. "I really just fancy some chips!"

It's a nice sight to see Robbie tucking into a mountain of chips. He eats a third before pushing it away. "Don't want the rest?"

"Naw, I've actually lost close to a stone. Doctor's said that would be normal. Appetite should pick up when me energy level does." He tells me.

I watch him take a deep breath and his face changes, "Did I say anything strange in the hospital?"

"You thought I was Lynn, you wanted her to leave the hospital and get some rest. I told you that she had left and then you realized I was there. You said my name and then you passed out and then got moved to recovery."

He doesn't seem relieved so I take a gamble, "Why?"

"Lynn told me I was talking about where to take you on our next date. I was kind of hoping you could help me out on that. Lynn says we should go to the theatre but I'm not so keen on that especially now" He augments his statement with wave to his stomach.

"How about we watch a film at my house? I can make dinner."

"Friday?" He asks.

"Sounds good." That way I have the rest of the week to think of what to cook.

_Lewis_

Its Wednesday I have my follow up at the Radcliffe. The attending physician is examining me, "Well Mr. Lewis your incisions have healed up nicely. Do you have any pain?"

"Not any more, shouldn't I have pain though?"

The doctor motions for me to sit up and I do. He pulls up a stool, "That's the beauty of laparoscopic surgery. While you have do have more incisions than a traditional appendectomy they are much smaller and the recovery time is faster. You can drive now in fact if you feel up to it you can begin exercise."

"When you say exercise" I find meself trailing off.

"Whatever you feel comfortable with and that includes sex." He informs me.

Even though I should be thrilled at the news I'm apprehensive. The apprehension carries into Friday.

The day blurs by at the station and soon Laura and I are eating the vegetable lasagna she has made complete with garlic bread. We sit comfortably on her couch we haven't picked out a film yet. The apprehension is growing and I can't ignore it.

"I'm nervous," I say softly.

She hears me and looks at me, "What of?"

"I want to be with you, you know in that way… but I haven't done that in such a long time I'm terrified that I won't please you."

_Hobson_

"I want to be with you, you know in that way… but I haven't done that in such a long time I'm terrified that I won't please you."

I hear his words and I know I must be staring.

When we began our courting I really doubted I would hear that but I suppose it makes sense we've known each other for over a decade. Also since he came back from the Virgin Islands we've been getting closer. "It goes both ways, what if I don't please you?"

He seems amused by my statement, "I don't think that will be a problem."

I'm undeterred by his jest, "Seriously what if I don't please you in that way?"

"Just have to work through it" Is his gravelly response.

I take his face in my hands, "Exactly" I tell him before I kiss him.


	6. Chapter 6

_Lewis_

We don't kiss for very long and I'm glad if anything were to happen now I think it would be a tad false. We've talked about something huge and we need to let that sink in. We pick an older film one we have both seen before so we don't have to pay too much attention to it. This also makes it easier when I get up to leave. Laura offers me her spare bedroom.

"Laura when I do spend the night it's going to be with you in your bed." She blushes at my words and I can feel me cheeks burn from the grin that splits me face. When I get home I hop in the shower to keep the incisions clean. I tilt my head up and let the water flow over my face. I wash me arms and neck then carefully move towards the incisions. I wash them taking care like Lynn showed me not to miss anything. When I carry on with the cleansing me cock springs to life. Instead of the anguished sigh that this would usually bring I close my eyes and imagine Laura here with me. I pretend my hand is hers and that the fine mist of spray from the showerhead is her hair brushing against me. The sound I emit echoes off the shower as I spill over my hand. Usually the self-stimulation I engage in is just to get the job done never for pleasure but times seem to be a changing.

_Hobson_

I clean up the kitchen table so I won't have to do it in the morning. I go to bed only to wake up hours later sweat-covered. God damned hot flash; I haven't had a period in over a year and I haven't had a hot flash in ages. I'm disgusted by my sheets and go to my bathroom. I wash my face and change my nightgown. I'm not going to change my sheets at three in the morning I just move to my guest room. This event is making me think about Robbie's words, I haven't had sex since in a while myself! And before menopause my sex drive erratic. The few times I did date it never led to anything I could never seem to get close and the job never gives flexibility.

I hate how my mind whirs at night; the blackness of night seems to make my thoughts seem more overwhelming. I'm starting to really think that perhaps I won't satisfy Robbie sexually.

I'm beyond frustrated and to tell the truth scared. I look at the clock it's a little before four in the morning. I take a shower and get ready for work.

The station still has a few lights on; I use my keycard to gain access to the medical bay. I use the time to file my recent death certificates and authorize the releases for the bodies to be buried. It's actually nice to get all this order. I sign off on other reports. It's half five when I begin an autopsy I think I scared Rawbone he was very surprised to see me in the bay. Nonetheless he stops, "You all right Laura?"

"Yes…. no I don't know."

The medi-bay is empty save for our "patients" and us, "I thought I was post menopausal but I had hot flash last night and it has me paranoid."

Angus looks thoughtful before moving off he returns with tourniquet and some vials. "Let's have a gander at your levels." I sit down and extend my arm the tourniquet is applied and he finds the vein on the first try. He places a cotton ball against the needle site and applies some tape. "I'll run some tests and get back to you."

I give him a smile and get back to my autopsy.

_Lewis_

I wake up before the sodding alarm and that pleases me. As I pull off the duvet I realize that after me shower I didn't dress for bed. Things are definitely changing. I have a quick shower as I dry my stomach making sure the scar tissue is dry. When I'm putting on me trouser I find that they are loose. I'm certain I will have to use the next notch on me belt to keep them up. I wonder if I will regain the weight back so I'll wait a little bit before taking them to the tailors. I rummage through my wardrobe and find a pair old black suit trousers to my joyful surprise they fit. I find a clean shirt and put on a tie. I'm chewing on toast as I leave the flat and head to the car. Since having the appendectomy I'm always checking the seatbelt making sure it lays flat. I can't believe the little things you notice after an injury.

_Hobson_

I ripped off the cotton ball hours ago since it was irritating me. I'm almost done with organs when Rawbone appears. I can read his body language, he has results but we'll talk when there are less people. When the bay empties out for lunch we move to an empty bay.

"There are no hormone fluctuations. Also your estrogen is consistent with that of a postmenopausal woman. " He tells me in his thick Scottish brogue.

"Then why did I have a hot flash?" I demand

"Now Laura, are you sure that is what it was?" He asks.

"Well what else could it have been?" I hiss.

I see Angus' clamp his mouth shut and his cheeks turn pink in all my years I've never seen this reaction. I stare harder and he balks. "Well, could it have been a nocturnal emission?"

I think my eyebrows have reached my hairline but I give weight to what Angus is saying and the fact that Robbie and I have been getting closer…it makes sense. I think Rawbone sees the thoughts run across my face for his merely pats me on the shoulder and leaves. Well it's nice to know I'm still capable of that!


	7. Chapter 7

_Hobson_

The awkwardness over discovering that I had an orgasm in my sleep has abated. I suppose I should regard it as a good thing! I'm in my fifties yet by body is acting like a teenagers. I put on some clean gloves and go back to work.

_Lewis_

Hathaway and I are still investigating the murder, today the boyfriend is coming in he arrives with his sister. The boyfriend is a wreck but I've seen tears before I'll know more when we ask some questions. The sister asks if she can wait outside to smoke. I see no problem with it but I tell her to stay in the carpark.

I begin with the caution, "You do not have to say anything, but it may harm your defence if you do not mention, when questioned, something which you later rely on in court. Anything you do say may be given in evidence."

The Youngman is silent, "Do you understand these rights?"

"Yes."

"What is your name and date of birth?" I ask as I slide into a chair.

"Martin Remy, Eighth of May 1989." He states with a sniff.

Christ he's younger than my son!

I can see he's really emotional, "Tell me about Melanie. How did you meet?"

This seems to help for he recalls a memory and calms. "We'd been together since school. She's Kelly's, that's my sister, best friend always hanging around and we got close."

"Did your sister approve of that?"

"Oh she was furious at first but she got over it. Besides we all went out together!"

"The week before she died can you tell me about that?"

"I'd ordered a ring, was going to pop the question. Kelly drove me to the jeweler she was a bit shocked herself at the ring but she assured me Mel would love it." Things are slotting into place and I shoot a look at Hathaway and he nods slightly.

"Ok Martin, the duty sergeant is going to get you a cuppa."

Hathaway and I leave the interview room standing just outside the now closed door. "Do you fancy the sister to for this?" I ask.

He doesn't bother with an answer he moves towards the entrance of the station and I follow. We're nearing the front desk when Cooper flies by us, "Summat on the CCTV."

We don't bother with questions we go outside and see Kelly is indeed smoking but she is soaking wet something tells me it's not water. As we near her we all smell the sharp smell of petrol. "Kelly? What's going on?"

"Don't play stupid! That's Martin's job." She hisses.

I need to keep her calm out of the corner of me eye I see James slip out of his suit jacket. Cooper dashes off to the station probably for an extinguisher or fire blanket. "Ok, ok. You killed Melanie didn't ya?"

"We were in the car, I tired to tell her that she shouldn't marry Martin. She got so angry I don't even remember striking her with the torch. Dad made me carry it in between the seats in case the car broke down he even taught me how to use it as weapon." She takes a drag of the cigarette and I'm drawn to the red ember glowing as bright as a beacon.

She is beginning to rock back and forth on her heels I move to the side and look in the small Honda I see that the seats are soaked with petrol as well. I look at Hathaway and somehow I can communicate this fact without speaking.

"Did you love Melanie is that what this is about?"

She barks with laughter, "He always takes what is mine and everybody lets him. I'm always supposed to share nothing is mine. I took what he wanted most."

"And this?" I wave in the general direction of the petrol soaked car and herself.

"Told Martin we had to pick up petrol for Dad's mower…I'm not going to prison." She says and I believe her. I've seen this look before on Cathy Michaels when she tired to kill me. If I rush her I might be able to get the cigarette. James must sense what my thoughts are for he shakes his head. It is in this moment that she takes a long drag and I know this is the moment. She catches fire first and the flames leap from her to the car. I rip my jacket off also and James and I rush her and knock her away from the blaze consuming the car. She falls to the ground and James does his best to knock out the flames instantly Cooper is there and vapor is expressed from the red canister. James is coughing from the effect of having his oxygen stolen away. He can't seem to move and the car is emitting intense heat. In a move reminiscent of not so long ago I throw him over my shoulder and move him and me away from the inferno somewhere along the way my glasses slip off. More sirens are approaching no doubt to put out the car. Rawbone, Laura and other medical personnel swarm over the mess. Angus runs towards Kelly barking orders while Laura kneels beside James and me. He's still coughing; Laura checks him over and yells at someone. They put an oxygen mask on him and yank off his tie. I'm beginning to feel pain in my right flank. It's growing and I moan.

I fall back onto the packed gravel of the carpark and Laura's face swims above me, "Where does it hurt?"

Her hands are running over my chest and I grab one and place it on the area where it hurts the most. James' coughs have subsided somewhat but I can't see him since my eyes are screwed shut. I feel coolness and realize my shirt has been opened her hands return.

"I think you've pulled a muscle in your stomach, which was already compromised, from your surgery. It's been a while since I've determined grades of abdominal tears."

The pain is lessening somewhat just by lying still, she's holds my hand. Soon I hear the muffled but ticked off baritone of my sergeant. He's arguing with someone over the oxygen mask. That someone happens to be Superintendent Innocent. "Leave it on!"

"I feel better." Is the muffled shout.

"I don't bloody care what you feel it stays on!" The shrill voice commands.

An ambulance looms and with assistance we pile in. James and I sit on a gurney and soon we're at Accident and Emergency. I'm diagnosed with a borderline grade II tear. I'm back to light duty it doesn't bother me since James is also stuck with the desk. The lungful of fire extinguisher burned his throat and since he smokes he'll be more prone to fits of coughing. Laura comes to collect us in her hands are my glasses I'm amazed that they're not scratched or otherwise damaged. James is under orders not to smoke for a few days, which has him in foul mood. I've been given another batch of painkillers.

I dry swallow some in Laura's car as she drives me home. "I'll pick you up in the morning and bring breakfast if you like."

"Stay with me? Not for that, just stay with me?"

Her face softens, "Of course."

We enter my flat and go about getting ready for bed. I shower while Laura rummages through my wardrobe when I'm done showering I see she has clad herself in one my old T-shirts. She looks comfortable and seductive but that will be saved for another time. We climb into bed and arrange ourselves. It's nice to share a bed again for I hate sleeping alone. Apart from the stomach pain the night passes quietly. I let the soft sighs of Laura's breath lull me to sleep.


	8. Chapter 8

_Hobson_

Robbie is asleep I'm not. In fact it is my goal to stay awake I know that we have all been through a traumatic day but James and Robbie have had the brunt of it. In fact I'm worried about James he's not staying with anyone. I slip out of bed and move to the front room. Robbie's T-shirt is long on me falling well below mid thigh. I'm about to switch on the electric kettle when a crash summons me. I dash into the bedroom and see Robbie flailing. He's already knocked off his mobile and keys from the bedside table. He's dreaming, I go to wake him.

I grab his biceps and say his name, "Robbie."

_Lewis_

Flames, flames are everywhere! James is unconscious and he's so heavy. I can't get out so we can't get out. I hear someone calling my name over and over. I latch onto it…

"Hey! It's me you're safe" It's Laura talking to me. I expel a breath and I'm sickened to find I'm shaking.

"Just a dream" she tells me as she runs her hand through my hair. Her fingers apply gentle pressure

I shake my head, "No nightmare."

I don't know if I offended her with my comment for she seems stricken but quickly recovers, "Come on, let's go into the front room. Get you a drink you probably need a painkiller as well." She tells me softly.

We get up and move to the couch. Before I reach the front room I bend down to pick up wayward the telephone.

_Hathaway_

Every time I get comfortable in bed I end up coughing. I'm keyed up and I'm dying to smoke but if I do I might end up actually dying. I get in my car and drive around I just drive not really paying attention to the destination. I notice that the streets are becoming familiar and with a snort I realize I'm outside Lewis' flat. I idle the car and smack my head on the ceiling when my mobile buzzes. Speak of the devil

**How are you?**

_Lewis_

The electric kettle is boiling I'm not really looking forward to tea at this late hour unless it has some whiskey in it. A knock at the door catches me off guard but I think I know already who is outside. Me suspicions are confirmed when I see the lanky frame of Sergeant Hathaway. "Come in"

A small smirk is his response. Laura and him begin a conversation I then realize that Laura is only asking yes and no questions.

"Throat sore?" I say softly.

He nods.

"From the coughing or the chemical junk from the extinguisher?"

"Both" is his rasp.

"Tea?" I ask.

Another nod, "Give James mine Laura, I want a finger of what's on the top shelf."

"Are you taking your pills with that?" Laura asks in a Motherly tone.

"Nope, that's why I want the drink."

As I sit down I mumble to Hathaway, "women"

It makes him laugh which leads to a coughing fit. The harsh sounds from James' throat has me thinking that he swallowed a broken beer bottle. The coughing isn't diminishing and he's clawing at the pocket of his jean jacket.

"Laura!" I bellow.

Instantly she is there and she's calm so bloody calm. Using two fingers she removes an inhaler from James' jean jacket pocket. She shakes it and pushes down on the metal canister and vapor shoots out. James' large paw of a hand encloses Laura's and both of them bring this L shaped piece of plastic to his mouth. Somehow the medication makes it into James' lungs and his coughs begin to subside.

As he is beginning to calm Laura takes the inhaler and looks at it. "albuterol…ready for the shakes?"

"Shakes?" I echo

She waves the inhaler, "this is a bronchodilator affecting beta-2-adrenergic receptors. In plain English it triggers the fight or flight response and you get the jitters."

"Ah" is me answer and I take a large measure of whiskey, I find my knees are a bit weak and I sit down hastily. Ever the doctor Laura brings over the whiskey bottle and pours me some more.

Laura wasn't kidding James' hands are trembling badly. I've seen alcoholics with less tremors.

I sit next to him and he whispers, "I hate not having control over my body." I run my hand over his shoulder trying to comfort.

"Why can't you sleep?" He whispers.

Since he confessed his weakness I suppose I should reveal mine, "Kept dreaming of you and me in the fire."

"That would do it" is his rasp.

I laugh at this statement. I switch on the television and hand the remote to James. It's unlikely that we will sleep. He flips through some channels as each one flicks by Laura can discern them from a one second frame and rattles off a list. "BBC 24, Men Behaving Badly, Treme, Coronation Street, The English Patient."

In the end James puts the channel onto the Gaming Network where people are playing Texas Hold 'em it's boring enough that Laura excuses herself and goes back to the bedroom.

"Night pet" I say as she walks by. James gives me a look, which I return. After about twenty minutes of watching people play cards I get up and remove a two boxes from a cabinet. I move back to the sofa and dump out a cribbage board, a red and blue peg, a deck of worn cards and a box of matches.

"No chess?" Is James' rasp.

"Not unless you want to play with yourself?" I say sharply earning me a smirk.

He shrugs and I shuffle the cards not wanting to draw attention to his trembling hands. We cut the deck to see who starts. James draws a two and I draw a Queen. I place the pegs at the start and we begin.


	9. Chapter 9

_Lewis_

James and I nearly got to the end of cribbage board before he fell asleep. I swung his legs as best I could up and onto the sofa. His breathing sounds terrible but he is breathing. I go back into me bedroom; Laura is asleep and in the middle of the bed. I inwardly smile at this; she's never had to learn to share.

_That's going to change!_

"Shift up duck" I mutter as I get into bed and she mumbles something incoherent but moves over. I get just under two hours of sleep before waking up a little after six. I hear voices, Laura's voice and James' grunts. I go into the living room and see Laura has put on her clothes from yesterday. I then realize that the only real pair of trousers that fit were damaged yesterday in the chaos and I groan.

Instantly Laura is there and she yanks up my cotton T-shirt to run her hands over my chest. If she keeps that up I'm going to drag her off to the bedroom and I won't care that James is still here. "Are you in pain?" Is her question.

"Yes, but not physical. I just realized I have to go clothes shopping."

She rolls her eyes and James' hisses no doubt his version of laughter.

"Well you two are no doubt on leave… I on the other hand need to get to work." She kisses me briefly before running her hand through James' hair and she's off.

James is scribbling something on a paper and then snaps his fingers to get my attention so I take said piece of paper.

_I'll take you shopping if you wish? _

I suddenly remember that my car is at the station since Laura drove me home. I could get a ride from a uniform to collect the car but that would bypass James and I as much as I hate shopping I hate doing it more alone.

I realize that I'm rubbing me stomach no doubt trying to soothe _something. _"Ta James. I think that would be a good idea."

It's a good thing he can't talk!

_Hathaway_

What I once thought of, as weakness is actually strength. Losing the ability to speak lets me more readily observe. I find that I don't have to readily communicate with Robbie and that's something I've rarely experienced. I always had to be overtly explicit with my parent s when it came to communicating with them. With my boss it's so simple, we first go to my flat so I can change and with a wave of my hand he knows _feel free to anything in my kitchen. _ I shower purposefully turning the shower hotter than normal. Orders from the doctors, steam will help my lungs. I find my skin has turned an angry pink from the hot water but I can breath better. I throw on some jeans and sweater making sure to put my inhaler in my pocket. As I come back into my living room I assess my boss. He too is dressed casually save for his glasses. Perhaps I can sway him to buy some purple socks.

_Lewis_

I just gotten measured for a two new suits I've also bought some trousers off the peg so I can wear something without it bunching up from the belt. If I thought James could be patronizing by saying "yes sir" Having him write it on a note pad is doubly patronizing. I'll be glad when he can speak again. We order some coffee from a small kiosk and take it to the car. James has forgone the usual cappuccino for one of those ice-blended thing and a thank you. We take them with us to the car. James slides behind the wheel. He takes a long sip through his straw while writing a message. The message never gets finished for he starts coughing. The harsh sounds are back. He's trying to get into the pocket of his jeans the sitting position is awkward for accomplishing this and he can't raise his hips off of the seat for he'll hit his head. I can see that panic is about to set in I dive over him and pull up on the small lever allowing his seat to recline. This new elevation and position grants him access to his pocket and the inhaler is withdrawn. I grab it and shake it for him and press the canister down just as Laura had done. Soon he is breathing easier. I grab me mobile and punch Laura's number. A few rings later she picks up.

_Robbie?_

Yeah Laura, I'm with James he just had one of those coughing fits. He drank this iced coffee get up…

_Cold drinks especially those iced ones can dry the throat, cold liquids should be avoided they can make the cough worse. Hot liquids are best_

"Right, thanks love."

I open the car door and dump the drink on the street not caring if I get done for littering. I hand James my hot coffee.

"Have mine, Laura says hot will be better for you."

As he reaches for it I see his hands are shaking I grab his wrist and help him. His eyes convey his thanks. He takes a drink and reclines.

"Come on switch seats, I'll drive." He complies and when he gets into the passenger seat he reclines it. No doubt needing a rest from his medication induced jitters. I drive him back to his flat. When we arrive he waves me in and points to the fridge. I go about making us something to eat. I text Laura and let her know I'm at James'. We eat lunch and I find that I don't eat as much as I once did. Perhaps I will maintain my stone and some change weight loss. I damned well better the amount of money I put down on that suit! We end up watching television during the daytime it's chock full of daytime drivel which I find oddly entertaining. Soon my eyelids become heavy.

_Hobson_

James lets me in and hands me a note

_No more ice drinks! Haven't needed another dose of albuterol. Robbie is asleep and yes he has eaten._

Short and informative that is James to a T. I walk over to the sofa and see Robbie crashed out. What's more he is drooling I find I don't have the heart to wake him.

"Fancy dinner?" I ask James and he grins. I use my mobile to find the number of the nearest and best take-away and order.


	10. Chapter 10

_Hathaway_

Laura was wonderful in not ordering Indian take-away. I'm sure my throat wouldn't have been able to handle it. Instead we're eating Greek food, the light tang of the yogurt on my gyro is refreshing. Somewhere between the food being delivered and us bringing down plates Robbie woke up. He stumbles to the table rubbing his eyes and yawning. He perks up once the food hits his stomach. We make light conversation over dinner. Tomorrow we will be back on duty as long as I don't do anything too stupid all should be well.

"What did you buy?" Laura asks.

"James took me to this place that specializes for tall more than big. I was able to buy some trousers off of the rack no need for alterations. Suit should be ready in a few days." He says and I see that he has eaten only half of his gyro and chips.

After dinner Robbie asks Laura to drive him to the station so he can collect his car.

_Hobson_

Robbie is twisting in his seat if I didn't know better I would think he was an actor in a hemorrhoid advert, "something amiss?"

"Bloody scar is itching!" He mutters as he rubs the area through his shirt.

As I pull into the station I chuckle in understanding

He gives me a look and reach up to flip on the dome and map light and pull aside my jeans and trace a faint scar. "You're not the only one who has had something removed."

His fingers reach out and touch the faint white line with reverence. "What happened?"

"In my early twenties before I started my medical residency I came down with the mumps. I never really felt better more visits to a doctor revealed I had a cyst on my left ovary. I had been skipping periods in college but I thought it was due to stress turns out it wasn't…had to have the ovary removed."

He chews on his lip before whispering, "How has that affected you?"

I take a breath in through my nose, "early onset menopause."

His face morphs into understanding "Losing one made the change quicker?"

He may not be a doctor but that doesn't mean he's not bright "Oh yes! If you lose an ovary before 35 it can bring on menopause 10 sometimes-even 12 years early. I had mine early quite a bit early."

"Are you upset by it?" He asks.

"I was. The thought of not having children would have me crying but I was doctor doing my thing! I barely had time for a social life let alone a child. I could have gone on HRT but the side effects put me off it. Besides the nice thing is I don't have to carry around a giant handbag to hold all my feminine hygiene products!"

"I'm also sterile" he tells me. "I didn't want Val having major surgery so I opted for it instead. So technically I could throw you in the backseat now?"

I slap his shoulder playfully and laugh he laughs too before whispering, "no you deserve better." He takes a hold of my left hand in his and begins a gentle massage and caressing of the palm and fingers. I can see a question burning in him "is there anything else I should know? Something I can do?"

At first I'm a bit insulted by this but I take note as to how he is caressing my hand and it hits me. "I'm not as well lubricated as I should be."

Robbie hands are still caressing my left one and the awkwardness that should be present during a conversation like this is absent. "Check" he says. He reaches for the door and I'm surprised that he doesn't kiss me.

"Don't fancy being bust by Cooper or the bloody CCTV." He tells me as he exits the car. The memory of us being interrupted by Cooper hits me and I'm glad that he had enough sense to remember for the both of us.

_Lewis_

I'm glad I found this out tonight! I was wondering how to broach the topic of birth control with Laura. It seems that is one hurdle we don't have to navigate. I feel saddened by the fact that Laura's body aged prematurely. Then again she might have died prematurely from a cancer or some other type of nastiness. A classmate of Lynn's lost both her ovaries when she was 12 and I remember how sad I was for her that she would never have children. I know that even if Laura's reproductive organs were functioning I couldn't give her a child. I think what bothers me the most is how your own body can betray you. Mine decided my appendix was a bother.

When I get home I find that I have a message, it's from Lynn. I just dial her number and she picks up on the third ring. Immediately she knows I'm bothered by something and like her Mother she is able to extract it from me. I first tell her about the car fire and James. I then tell her about Laura and she knows that that is what is really bothering me. She mentions papers and reports in some Journal of Embryology that go into detail on this. I find myself smiling Lynn is so bloody clever. When I do end our conversation I feel refreshed. I'm not tired and I know if I go to bed now I'll be staring at the ceiling. I grab the car keys and head out.

I find myself at Aphrodite's Pleasures a more upscale sex shoppe. There are few people in the shoppe and walk inside and make my way to a wall of bottle. A woman in her thirties asks if I need help I surprise myself by actually articulating what I want.

"Me girl has been through menopause and I need something."

The assistant points to a row of clear bottles. "A water based lubricant will be the best. This one is particularly good for it warms on contact. Also it doesn't have the tendency to get sticky or gummy. It does come in other varieties, flavor, scents and such but I think good ole plain will do you." She opens a bottle and places some on my finger and directs me to rub it with my thumb. It's unbelievably slick and like she said it warms. I bring my thumb to my nose and smell it's not offensive. "This'll do."

She smiles, "Can't interest you in something else? Handcuffs maybe?"

I don't think when I answer, "Already got a pair."


	11. Chapter 11

_Lewis_

This has to be one of the most painless visits to an adult store I've ever had. When I get home I remove the bottle from the black plastic bag. I'm about to chuck the bag in the bin when I feel something in it. I reach in and find three small sample containers of the lubrication I bought. I silently thank the sales girl I had been wondering on the drive home of what to do with the bottle. Should I leave it Laura's? Should I leave it here? What would I have done if the _moment _came with out the bottle handy? Now I can more readily transport some of this substance without worry. I secure the purchases and get ready for bed.

In the morning I forego the suit for just some trousers and a button up shirt. James and I are still on desk duty. The clothes that James helped me choose are cut rather well. That combined with my stone and some change loss of weight has me actually looking at myself in the mirror with some pride. The illusion is shattered when I catch the look on my face as I scratch one of my incisions.

James is also in casual clothing when he sits down I capture his attention and make an L with my thumb and forefinger. He waves his inhaler at me and surprises me by speaking, "Actually doing much better today sir." His voice is tad rough but nothing like before. We get cracking on our files I stop multiple times for I can't read James' writing. His penmanship is atrocious but I guess that's the trade off since he can type really fast. I see a pattern developing we get injured clear our desks go on a call out then get injured. I'm really hoping this doesn't become a permanent pattern. I prefer the piles of papers on the desk to me it mean I'm out and about actually doing things.

A knock on the doorframe has me and James looking up, it's chief Super. Since she's our superior and a woman we both rise from our chairs but she waves us back down. Her professional mask is on. "Kellson Angela Remy better known as Kelly died from her injuries this morning."

"Will there be an inquest?" I ask.

"Yes" Innocent informs us.

I watch as James closes his eyes as he expels a breath through his nose. I simply throw the pen I was signing forms with down on the blotter. I knew that with severe burns living is tenuous at best. I don't know what I was expecting even if she survived recovery would have been painful and then she would have been shoved into prison. I just feel conflicted and I hate feeling that way.

"Stomach healthy enough for a pint?" James asks.

"Yeah, you?" I fire back waving at his throat.

He smirks, "Whiskey does well when it's mixed with coffee."

I return his sly grin and we head out. We head out to the pub not talking we get our drinks and sit outside, it's a beautiful day. I take in the sunshine; I tilt my head up towards the sun and close my eyes. I would have carried on but my mobile buzzes, I'm still amazed that I don't have to extend me arm or give the phone to James to read the text messages. My mobile informs me that my suits are ready. At least I'll have something to wear to the inquest.

_Hathaway_

The day of the inquest is here; Robbie will be giving evidence since he is the officer in charge of the investigation. Dr. Hobson has just told the magistrates that Melanie McClenith died from a subdural hematoma not from drowning. The bruising and contusions are consistent with that of a torch. She is thanked an then is moved to the gallery. She sits beside me.

"Detective Inspector Robert Lewis" A voice barks and my boss is led in. He assumes Laura's previous position and raises his hand. He takes the oath and the magistrate approaches him.

"Inspector Lewis, can you describe the events depicted here?" The magistrate waves to a television playing the CCTV footage.

"DS Hathaway and I were interviewing Kellson Remy's brother when he made it known that his sister and the victim had some previous interactions. We suspended the interview and went to collect Miss Remy. She had gone outside to smoke, Sergeant Hathaway and I were about to exit the station when another police officer informed us that 'something was going on'".

Everyone is transfixed as Robbie points to the television screen. "As we approach I saw that she was covered in petrol. You can see here that Hathaway is removing his jacket and this individual is DS Cooper running to get an extinguisher. I asked her about Melanie and she said that she had struck her with a torch and she did not want to go to prison. She then took a drag from her cigarette and –" He trails off for the video shows what happens next. It's strange to see myself and Robbie rush the immolating Kelly on the television screen. Kelly falls and I see myself trying to use my coat to smother the flames. The car fire is this white blur on the screen. The extinguisher adds to the blur and then I see myself thrown over Robbie's shoulder and people swarming towards us. The magistrate ends the tape when we both collapse onto the gravel.

_Hobson_

We've just watched the video evidence, which I consider incontrovertible nonetheless this is an inquest.

"Why wasn't she brought in for questioning earlier?" Another magistrate demands.

"First we had to rule out suicide and indentify the body. The dental records weren't as quick in coming over; the dentist in question did not have the ability to send files digitally. During this time I was taken to hospital when I came back and we got formal identification the investigation resumed. We learned that Miss McClenith had a boyfriend and we asked him to come in for questioning and he was brought by his sister."

"Why again was she allowed to leave the station?"

I can see that Robbie is getting frustrated but nearly thirty plus years of being on the force have him contained. "She had asked to have a cigarette outside and at the time we had more reason to suspect the boyfriend."

The magistrate leans on a lectern, "Oh one more question, why were you on medical leave?"

Robbie simply stares at the magistrate," Inflamed appendix which needed immediate removal"

The inquest is adjourned so they can deliberate a verdict. We pile out of the chamber and James, Robbie and I move towards the railing. James sits on one of the benches and Robbie places his hands on the railing and stares down into the floors below. I stand beside him and place my hands on the rail also. Soon my hand is covered by one of his warm and comforting. As I turn to look at him my breath catches for he is looking at me with such reverence, love and something else that I realize is _hunger_. All I can do is nod and he smiles, we go back to staring at the floors below as we wait to be called back in. However, he doesn't let go of my hand. After twenty minutes we are recalled into the chamber.

We all sit in the gallery to hear the ruling.

"It is the judgment of this inquest that the death of Melanie McClenith was perpetrated by Kellson Remy. It is also our ruling that the death of Kellson Remy was self-inflicted and that the Police had no part in her suicide. This inquest is hereby adjourned." The gavel is banged and once again the chamber is emptied. As bodies stream past us I hear his whisper, "Can I see you tonight?"

My heart is beating so fast I'm afraid it will drown out my answer but I say it anyway, "Yes."


	12. Chapter 12

_Hobson_

I've been home for about two hours and I'm trying to keep from looking out of my window at every passing car I hear. I've never had a man look at me like Robbie did today at the inquest. I've had men look at me with animal lust but it has never been tempered by affection or even a hint of love. I think the five years we've spent together as friends and the last month of courting have me flustered. I've never really had a long-term boyfriend. I had flings in college and one steady relationship, which lasted almost a year. Most of my relationships seemed to wither, I would move or my partner did. Goals would change. This is different, all the things we've been through separately and together. He lost his wife and went away. I carried on here and had my own issues. He came back and I remember when I first saw him, if I hadn't been carrying my metal case I would have hugged him fiercely. I'm so wrapped up in the memory that the knock on my door startles me. I go to answer it and on my doorstep is the man I have spent so much time thinking about. The well-cut black suit from the inquest still adorns him capped off with those glasses.

"Come in." I say and he does.

"Can I take your jacket?" He simply shakes his head in the negative and I start to panic. My panic is replaced with surprise when he kisses me. His hands are cupping my face and he drinks from my mouth like a thirsty man. I return his kisses and secure my hands around his broad back. We kiss in my entryway for god knows how long before he pushes me back against the wall and attacks my neck for good measure. Kisses, licks and gentle bites have my head spinning. When he gnaws tenderly on a pulse point I moan. His mouth returns to mine and we kiss once more. Tongues battle and I find myself not caring who wins. Somehow during all of this he has pulled up my blouse and tugged down my waistband to reveal my scar. He gets down on his knees without making a sound and kisses the faint white lines.

"I love you," he tells me in-between kisses. "All of you. Everything. To me you're perfect."

My throat is frozen and I can't respond, all I can do is run my fingers through his hair. I grab his jacket and pull him back up to me. Our mouths meet again and it doesn't take long for our kisses to turn carnal. I take things a step further when I push off his jacket and it lands on the floor in a whisper. He's pushing me backwards and I manage to get his tie off and it lays abandoned on the stairs. So far none of my clothes mark the path but he does have my blouse open. I grope blindly for my door handle and we somewhat stumble into my bedroom. When we break apart for air I take a moment to pull off his glasses that have steamed up and I place them carefully on a book on my bedside table.

I still can't get my throat to work I inhale sharply but it still can't say it. He see's my distress and traces my cheek. "I know you do" is his response and I can feel tears pricking the corners of my eyes. I feel embarrassed by my display of emotion but that is soon erased by a bite to my shoulder. My blouse is pushed off of my shoulders and I realize that I'm showing more skin than he is. He seems to read my thoughts and begins to unbutton his shirt. I find myself watching in rapt attention, he starts from the top down and memory sparks that I've only seen his chest when he was writhing in pain in the carpark. The doctor in me lets me know his incisions are fine while the woman in me says _Mine!_

More clothes are shed but not before Robbie reaches into his pocket and withdraws a small packet placing it beside his glasses. I thought we had this discussion that condoms weren't needed then I notice that the plastic is not flat it's swollen. We fall onto the bed clad in only our undergarments. We lie on top of the duvet kissing and touching with hands and mouths everywhere. He expertly unhooks my bra with one hand and I watch as it flies into a corner. His warm hands roam my chest and I moan.

"Yeah, let me know what you like" is his rumble. I'm lost in sensation.

_Lewis_

While I pay homage to Laura's chest I use one hand to reach for the small package on the table. I'm able to ensnare it and with my teeth I'm able to remove the tab at the top. I move my mouth over a nipple so I can place some of the fluid onto my fingers. I then trace her labia before slipping inside. Her eyes fly open and I wonder if I've hurt her.

The look on her face tells me that I haven't. I move my fingers in a certain pattern over the small spot within her. Her eyes shut and her hips rise causing me to grin in smugness that I've found the place that will make her come apart. While my middle and index finger keep Laura spiraling upward I put more lubricant onto my thumb and circle her clit. Her hands are rhythmically clutching the duvet. I thread my fingers through one of her hands. I want her to know I'm here with her and when she shatters I'll be here to put her back together. Her chest is heaving and is beginning to flush a deep red. I increase the speed of my fingers and a few moments later I'm rewarded with a lustful wail. I don't stop my fingers I simply slow them letting Laura spin down slowly.

She moans again in obvious pleasure and reaches out for me. I carefully remove my fingers and cover her body with mine and resume kissing her mouth. Her hands are in my hair and her fingernails make my scalp tingle adding a new and wonderful sensation to this experience. I want to take hours with her.

_Hobson_

This is new. Normally I would have to beg plead and moan with my lovers to be granted an orgasm or I would have to care of business myself. The fact that Robbie pleasured me and hasn't taken his own pleasure yet is welcome change. I can feel his erection pressing hot and hard against my thigh. I move my body beneath him and he moves to compensate. With a careful shift of my hip his falls between my parted thighs. I buck up with my pelvis and I can feel the tip of him nudge against me.

He moves quickly and kneels between my thighs. His hands reach for something I can't see.

_Lewis_

This is it; I'm about to take another woman as a lover. The second in my lifetime I remember what Laura told me and I swipe the packet of lube from the bed. I drip some onto my shaft and before sinking back down onto my elbows. I balance my weight onto one while I use my free hand to guide myself into Laura. The slick lubricant eases my entry and after a few seconds I'm seated fully within her. Hot, smooth and welcoming are the only thoughts I can muster to describe the feeling. It's been so long and I want to make it good for her but I feel as though I'm going to fly apart right now. Once again Laura's nails add a sensation this time pain. Her nails dig into my biceps and the sharp bite clears my head and gives me control over the rising swell threatening to drown me. I kiss her lips and tilt my hips earning me a sigh. I begin to thrust my hips and the sigh is replaced with a moan. I want to hear that more than anything so I repeat the movement and add more force. She moans again and my brain short circuits. The only thing I can do is to keep her making that sound. Over and over my hips collide with hers until the tide can be kept back no longer and I drown but she's there to bring me back.

_Hobson_

I never was one for bedtime reading but right now I can see the appeal. A lifetime ago it seems I was given a book for my birthday, I can't remember the author but the title has a number in it. I had it beside my bed in a halfhearted attempt to read it. I never really got beyond the first page. Currently Robbie is propped up against my headboard, glasses on, reading this cheesy yet oddly entertaining book whilst I'm cuddled up beside him. He laughs as he reads about setting dog shit on fire and I laugh as well partially due to the book but mostly to the long and winding path that it took for us to come to _this. _This is now my weakness.


End file.
